This month Susan wrote a comment about the 1/3/10 post with the following comment: “Your tip on multitasking really resonated with me. For years I was proud to be a “multitasker”; now I am just tired. It started off so easily, I was young, energetic and driven. I prided myself in how much I could achieve in a day! But some where along the line the bar just kept getting higher. I became more successful at my job, got married, had kids. As my responsibilities grew and so did the multitasking! Now all this juggling is just expected of me and continues to worsen as the kids become teenagers and my company keeps downsizing. I am constantly in “5th gear” which is not only dangerous but it is burning up my fuel. What do I do? This is my life!!!! How do I slow this down?”Is Multitasking the reality of your life? Are you like Susan, caught in a cycle that is hard to break? What can you do about it? My first suggestion would be to become aware of it! When you are rushing begin to distinguish when your life is full because that is your reality or if you are filling it up to distract yourself. During the winter, because I am more housebound, I sit at the computer often because I have forgotten what else to do to relax. Initially it is a habit I enjoy, but hours later I am wound up and not the least bit relaxed. What is it that you do?
If you are caught in the frenzy of multitasking, a good solution is to become conscious of what is happening at the specific time. It is helpful to be open to your thoughts and feelings and try not to evaluate or judge them. Begin to identify and label what is occurring and how you are feeling. For example, “I am thinking”, “I am worrying”, “I am feeling overwhelmed”. You might also ask yourself the following questions:
- Do I need to be doing this right now?
- What could I postpone for a later date or not do at all?
- What’s the worst that would happen , if I don’t do it?
- Do I want to do this now? If not, when?
- How much time do I want to spend on it?
- What motivates my behavior?
- What would I be doing if I wasn’t busy right now?
What do you do if, like Susan, the demands of life are real and you do have a great deal of expectations and responsibility? Have you ever considered making time to take a half an hour lunch break and go for a walk? Could you take a half day one weekend a month and spend it the way you wish? Is that too much time for “you”? How about just taking two hours a month? Often my clients tell me that they “can’t afford to pamper themselves”, yet they find the money to buy their children luxuries and the time to drive their children to every extra curricular activity imaginable. What is wrong with this picture? When does “good parenting” turn into over indulgence at the parent’s expense? What kind of modeling is being done here? Are you making another generation of multitaskers?
Does your mind race and have you forgotten how to relax? Are you conscious of what is happening in your day and your reaction to the situation? Are you honest with yourself? I hope that you will begin to be aware of the way you think and act and label it with “soft mental notes”**. It is my hope that this month, you will become aware of when you multitask and question if you really wish to stay in 5th gear.
** “A Soft mental note” is the nonjudgmental description of your feeling.
Blog questions:
When do you multitask?
What helps you to slow down when you multitask?
“Most of the time multitasking is an illusion. You think you are multitasking, but in reality you’re actually wasting time switching from one task to another.”
Boco Tjan - Professor at University of Southern California
